Navigating Conflict in the Workplace

Most of us shy away from conflict and back off or avoid the situation if it feels like it might be confrontational. Yet, conflict is inevitable in organisations if you view conflict as a different point of view!

As humans our greatest gift is our ability to think and speak. This means we will form our own opinions and have something to say – yet we get surprised or annoyed or irritated or irked or intimidated or … when someone disagrees with our point of view.

This can often act as a trigger and cause us to re-act rather than stop and consider where the other person is coming from.

Conflict is a Gift

Conflict, or differing points of view, can be the starting point of creating a better solution, better product or better way of working. So, how can we train ourselves to treat it as such?

A starting point might be around our own mindset and instead of instantly re-acting to what has been said maybe we need to re-purpose around the relationship you want to have.

When I’m working with leaders around influence and impact there are 2 questions I often ask:

1. Does your intention match your impact?
2. What outcome do you want from the relationship?

I ask the first question because we often judge ourselves by our intention and we judge others by the impact they have on us. It’s rare that someone will consider their own impact given the individual or audience they have in front of them.

I ask the second question so that you can consider where the relationship is and consider where you may want to take it. Start with at least maintaining the relationship at its current position and at best building the relationship.

Considering both of these questions will inform you on the approach most likely to achieve the outcome and impact you desire.

The Art of Listening

Listening truly is an art as there are many things we can pay attention to in both your audience and more importantly YOU.

You are the only person you are in control of. So pay attention to what is happening to you as well as your audience, tuning into the following areas:

• Words – Listen to the words, tone, timbre and pitch
• Emotion – What do you see and hear that gives some indication of the mood or emotion that is present?
• Physiology – What do you notice about the way they sit, stand, move, and breathe?
• Energy – What are you picking up energetically?

As you are doing this be curious, ask questions, suspend your own judgement, solicit input and check your understanding by summarising what you are hearing.

I know all of this sounds simple, and it is – as long as you practice.

So to summarise;

A – ask questions, listen, and get curious

S – summarise what you hear, solicit information, suspend judgement

K – Keep practicing 

If you have a difficult situation at works that you need some support with please get in touch to set up a call. Email me at Dawn@aurora4success.co.uk.

“Amid this constant surge of information, attention has become our most precious asset.”

Jocelyn Glei