What if anything are you putting off doing?
It may be at
work or at home. As I write this I have identified at least 2 things. I could
come up with a longer (wish) list and I have refocused on what am I not doing
that I know I need to do that will help me achieve my goals this year.
What pattern, of avoidance, are you repeating?
Fear
Often, when we stop and think, the thing that holds us back
and stops us taking action is FEAR!
It may be a fear of failure, fear of looking stupid, fear of success, fear of being visible, fear of being rejected………..… and the list goes on. This fear is often disguised by some very good reasons we make up to justify our inaction – better know as excuses.
It may result in what I call displacement activity, something that is easy to do such as searching the Internet, doing the washing, calling a friend, going for a coffee………. And deep down you know you are avoiding doing the thing you keep promising you’ll do. What excuses do you find you use?
It may be a fear of failure, fear of looking stupid, fear of success, fear of being visible, fear of being rejected………..… and the list goes on. This fear is often disguised by some very good reasons we make up to justify our inaction – better know as excuses.
It may result in what I call displacement activity, something that is easy to do such as searching the Internet, doing the washing, calling a friend, going for a coffee………. And deep down you know you are avoiding doing the thing you keep promising you’ll do. What excuses do you find you use?
Change happens one step at a time, one day at a time. We can
often fall into being a perfectionist and wanting to know/learn how to do
something perfectly before actually doing it. Yet that’s not how we learn to
drive a car, or ride a bike.
Admittedly you have an instructor next to you when you are
learning to drive and you are put in the driving seat from day one, moment one.
When you learn to swim you are put straight into the water and then given
instruction and when you learn to cook you are put into a kitchen with
ingredients. We take action and it’s often far from perfect! Yet we learn. We
overcome our fear and learn from our mistakes.
Mistakes are a gift
In business I find many people are afraid of making mistakes
and yet it is by making mistakes we learn. Ideally we want to make them in a
safe environment where we have the support around to help us move forward, and
sometimes it doesn’t work out that way – believe me I know. I’ve had a few
‘disasters’ – aka great learning experiences!!
So, what action do you need to take to move forward on your
goals? Be courageous and be ready to take imperfect action and then ask
yourself:
·
What result did I get? Is this what I wanted?
·
What worked? What did I do well?
·
What didn’t work?
·
What do I need to do instead? What can I do
differently?
And have another go…………. And repeat. None of us are perfect,
sorry to break that to you in a rather unsubtle way, but we are not. We are all
unique. We all have our own learning to undertake and it’s continuous!!
Where you do have the opportunity to practice in a safe
environment? Do it and ask the same questions above. Who can you rely on to
give you honest feedback?
What do you want feedback on? What are your goals? Share
this with them, it will help them give feedback.
Learning and achieving our ambitions or aspirations takes
courage and the way to see/hear/ get a sense of how you are doing is to get
feedback.
Be prepared to take imperfect action and learn! Be prepared to get feedback even though you know what you have done is not perfect.
No situation is perfect and therefore no action is perfect.
No situation is perfect and therefore no action is perfect.
"One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward
growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and
again."
Abraham
Maslow
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